Complementarianism: What Is It?
Why Should I Believe It? Why Should I Delight in It?
In light of some recent controversies in the Reformed Church
pertaining to human sexuality the editors of the Herald Blogs solicited a short
submission from me on the topic of complementarianism. I hope that you will find this concise post
both timely and helpful as you consider the teaching of the Scriptures
concerning human sexuality.
Let’s start with the
basics: What is complementarianism?
Complementarianism is a belief based on two core truths:
1. God
created Adam and Eve, man and woman, equally in his own image.
It cannot be emphasized enough that
complementarians believe strongly and unequivocally that men and women are of
equal value, dignity, and worth in the sight of our loving Lord.
2.
Men and
women are given different and equally joyful and significant roles in marriage
and the church. These unique roles work
together (they complement one another)
in such a way that achieves God’s purposes for his people. The complementarian believes the Bible is
clear that men are given the weighty responsibility to lead in the home and the
church while women are given the joyful duty of submitting to and helping their
husbands and male elders as they lead.
So, why should you
believe that men and women are created with complementary roles instead of
identical or interchangeable roles?
Let’s consider a few brief passages from the Scriptures:
1.
Adam and Eve were designed differently and
with different roles within God’s good creation. Adam’s role of leadership within the creation
is established already before the Fall in a number of ways. Adam was formed first from the dust of the
earth while Eve was formed second from Adam’s rib. Adam is given the honor of naming not only the
animals (who are not created in God’s image) but Eve as well. (Gen. 2:23) Adam was formed to work the earth while Eve
was formed to be Adam’s helper. (Gen.2:15&18)
2. The differences established by God in the
beginning are normative patterns for male-female relationships within the church
and the home.
It is quite apparent from even a casual
reading of the New Testament that men and women maintain distinct roles within
marriage and the church.
a.
Ephesians 5:22-25
makes this point clearly saying, “Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the
Lord. For the husband is the head of the
wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its
savior. Now as the church submits to
Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the
church and gave himself up for her.” See also: Colossians 3:18-19.
b.
In I Timothy 2:12-13
Paul speaks of the need for male eldership in the church saying, “I do not
permit a woman to teach or to exercise authority over a man; rather, she is to
remain quiet. For Adam was formed first,
then Eve.” Notice here that Paul grounds
his teaching not on present cultural issues, but in the creation order itself
as we saw earlier.
Now, finally, why should I delight in these
teachings?
I’m a
product of the modern feminist West. I
grew up thinking that women could and should be elders and pastors; in fact the
very first two people I nominated for the office of elder were women. I was a full-fledged unapologetic believer in
women’s ordination and I had a mind to stick it to the knuckle dragging
Neanderthals from the dark ages who thought differently than I did. But then something strange happened to me: I
met my wife and she was a complementarian and soon thereafter I realized that
the Bible is too.
Above all
else it should delight us that every godly marriage and every church is a
theatre in which God’s gospel--the self-sacrificing love of Christ for his
church and the joyful submission of the church to Christ--is to be powerfully
proclaimed. Of course what we want most
is to glorify God and to proclaim the gospel of Jesus! Embracing the complementarity of man and
woman in our homes and churches is a powerful and joyful way in which we can do
just that.
Ben Kappers
is the pastor of the Baileyville Reformed Church.
For more information
on the unique and complementary beauty of manhood and womanhood check out www.cbmw.org, and be sure to check out the Danvers Statement.
Also for a more
in-depth analysis of the biblical and wonderful differences between men and
women be sure to get your free PDF copy of “What’s the Difference” by Dr. John Piper.
All Scripture
references are taken from the English Standard Version (Crossway, 2001)
